Taking a Punch!

I am taking a moment from the chronological side of events and talking about a topic that has been weighing on my mind for about a month now.  It is how I have fought through some weight set backs that have come during the month of July and first part of August.

TAKING A PUNCH:

Through my previous weight loss attempts, I believed that I had sticking points, brick walls that stopped my progress and caused me to revert back to old form.  It is this phenomenon that took place every time I would get to a barrier and I would see my behavior degrade into the same old, same old.  In the past these barriers were events/celebrations (the holidays come to mind), weight loss numbers, or times of year (the stress of beginning school).  The mental block that accompanied these barriers was often the finishing touch that would get me to quit and end promising starts to weight loss efforts.  This all ranged from self-sabotage, fear of missing out on perceived fun, or lack of planning to avoid these sticking points.

However, I am redefining these barriers as punches.  This goes along with my workout routines as I am learning to box from Doug (my trainer).  My belief is that there never was a barrier, but rather a punch that would stagger me.  In the past, I allowed these punches to get me to back down, become complacent, or even forget all the reasons why I was losing weight, and fool myself into believing that it didn't matter what I did.  In life, I always looked at adversity as an opportunity to show what I was made of, except in my weight loss experiences.  I can tell you that is a thing of the past. 

The reality is that everyone who strives to lose weight, takes a punch along the way.  Some of the punches are small, some are big, they vary in frequency, and they always come when we are at our weakest or believe that we are doing everything right.

I had small punches along the way until I took my family on vacation this summer.  When we left, I weighed in at 378.6 and had been fighting a yo-yo of losing and gaining for about three weeks straight.  While on vacation, I had my moments where I would eat too much or make poor choices, but these were always coupled with lots of daily activity.  In fact, I would argue that I was more active that week than I had been during any week over the past five years.  When I returned, I expected to see an increase of maybe a pound or two.  If I was lucky maybe it would even out.  After all, I was active and making decent decisions overall.

As I stepped on the scale, I was subjected to an upper cut from nowhere- 390.6 lbs!  WHAT THE HELL!?!?  Yes, I gained 12 lbs in one week.  Needless to say I was stunned, down in the dumps, and doubting all at once.  As in times past, I needed comfort and I began to eat.  Another day of damage took place as I figured, I will put myself back on track - TOMORROW.  What a dangerous word - tomorrow.  Every great "could've been" starts tomorrow.  However, by the grace of God, I caught myself.  As if I was a boxer who just got knocked to the canvas and realized that the referee was counting, I got my senses and got up to keep fighting.

The first thing I did was take stock.  Twelve pounds in one week, meant there had to be an element of water in all of this.  I started to figure that I could flush and sweat this out of my system.  The remaining weight, well I spent some time trying to figure out what went wrong.  I started to think directly about my meals and calorie intake from the previous week.  As I carefully thought, I realized that I was not making good choices during that week.  At this point, I ended my analysis of the previous week.  In fact, I ended any dwelling on the situation.  This turned out to be very important, as I was fighting the thoughts of how hopeless it all seemed and how much damage I had done.  This was not helping me, in fact it was tearing down my mental focus of staying positive and dwelling on the good that I was accomplishing.

I got back to basics.  Positive mindset, daily affirmations, tracking what I was eating, following through with my workouts, staying away from overly processed foods, and maintaining my spiritual connection for strength.  In doing this, I lost 10.4 lbs that next week.  The following week, I lost the rest of the vacation weight and an extra .2 lbs.  Then I got cocky, and I gained 9.2 lbs the following week.  I refocused again and rebounded with a 10 lb loss.  The reality is that I am sure I was dealing with a good amount of fluid, but this also was an opportunity to learn and believe in myself and the program that I have designed.

I realized that I have to stay focused and that every week will have its ups and downs.  We cannot judge weight loss or any self-improvement, for that matter, on the results of one week or the desperation of a moment.  The key is to take the punch and get up from the canvas.  Hey, anyone can be tough when they are throwing the punches, but it is when we get hit that we find out what we are made of.  As throughout all of time, I believe that people have proven, through God's grace, we are all tough as nails when it counts!  DON'T GIVE UP!  DON'T EVER GIVE UP!

Weekly Update: I am excited to say that I have met my next goal!  I weighed in at 373.4 lbs yesterday morning (the goal was to get to 375).  This is a 4.2 lb elimination from the week previous.  My next goal is a short one, as I strive to get to the 60 lbs lost marker (when I reach 372.2 lbs).

Overall, I am in good place, but I must admit losing 58.8 lbs and realizing that I am not even close to my overall goal is disheartening.  However, I am staying focused on going one day at a time and I remind myself that it took me 37 years to gain all this weight.  It is not going to come off overnight or even in one year.  I just have to keep plugging away.  :)